swan_forest | Unrequited Love?

Entry tags:

kise ryouta

Unrequited Love?

Kaijou and Seirin had just had their first practice match, which was shaping up to be a tradition of sorts. This time, Kaijou had gone to Seirin. The gym was nice, newer then Kaijou's but maybe not as big.

He was breathing heavily, but smiling broadly. It always felt good to play, even if it was just a practice match and they weren't going all out. After all, he wanted to keep some of his new tricks up his sleeves, just like he was sure Kagami and Kuroko were hiding some of their new tricks too. This year's match had ended in a draw. Better than last year's practice match, which had ended in Kaijou's loss by two points.

Just thinking about Kuroko made Kise look over to the Seirin team, focusing in on the smaller boy.

For awhile now Kise had realized that he had feelings for Kuroko. Kise had looked up to Kuroko for awhile, but it wasn't really until after the Winter Cup that Kise realized he was probably in love with Kuroko.

He took a towel that one of the first years offered him. "Thanks," he said absently. He scrubbed at his face, his thoughts racing. He had been thinking about Kuroko a lot lately, and seeing him only brought those thoughts back to the surface, only pushed aside when the game had begun. Now with the game over he couldn't focus. The warm glow in his chest that came whenever he thought about Kuroko was back with a vengeance.

The Kaijou team was gathering their things and getting ready to board the bus. He told the first year that he'd be along in a bit and began to head over to the Seirin team.

"Kurokocchi~" he called out. No time like the present, he thought. He didn't know if Kuroko would return his feelings, but he was hopeful. The time Kuroko had cheered him on while he went up against Haizaki stood out in his mind.

"Kurokocchi! You got a minute?"

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

"I don't intend on pursuing it," he answers with a shrug and resists the urge to roll his eyes at his lights. "They're interested in someone else."

"Boo," Kise said and flopped back down on the ground. "That doesn't mean you can't tell me who it is."

He poked Kuroko in the side, pouting at him. "I'm sorry they're interested in someone else. They're missing out in how great a person you are."

"Honestly, I would prefer if no one knew."

Kuroko looks down at the blond for a moment before casting his gaze back over to the court. "It's my own fault. I realized too late."

Kise's brain stops for a moment.

'Realized too late.'

That phrase repeats in his head a couple of times. Does Kuroko mean...?

No. He can't. Because if he did...

Kise decides that his first thought is wrong. Kuroko can't mean him.

"Well, if you want to talk about it, you know I'm willing," he said after a moment.

"Thank you, but there isn't much to say." The idea of talking about his feelings to the person in question especially seems a bit mortifying, even if Kuroko thought he had a rather good poker face. "If anything, I would rather go back to being wholly disinterested in romance."

It would be much easier to navigate - the unfamiliarity of dealing with feelings like this has him feeling unsettled.

"Consider the offer open indefinitely," he said. "Sometimes it helps get it off your chest."

He hummed, fingers running through the grass as he looked up at the sky.

"You know, I've been wondering. Is it just in general you're not interested in? Or are you not interested in sex either?"

He finishes off his onigiri, contemplative over Kise's offer. "I'm not sure it would help much."

And he sighs, contrasted by a soft blush rising in his cheeks. "I'm a normal teenage boy, Kise-kun. I just don't think it was very relevant until now."

"It might be in the future," he countered.

"Hmm... Just tells me you get horny. Do you think you could do it with a stranger just for fun, or do think you could only do it with you really like the person."

"I understand this is the norm for many and I'm not trying to cast judgement on anyone else," looking at you, Aomine, "but... I personally don't see the point in engaging with someone I had no interest in."

Kise rolls back up to a sitting position. "I mean, you're not wrong. I want my first time with someone I'm in a relationship with..." His eyes drift to Akashi, who has made Kuroko's lights kneel in front of him to stop the argument, his face warming as he recalled what they did on their last date. They haven't gone all the way, not yet, but they just rounded third base for the first time. "But after that, I don't think I'd mind if someone picks me up at a party or something."

He looked back at Kuroko. "I've been reading about sexuality a lot lately, and I think you're demisexual. It sounds a lot like you from what you've told me."

He tears his own gaze away from the scolding session, trusting Akashi to be able to tame his two big cats.

"Demisexual...?" He tilts his head, trying out the word as he looks back at Kise. It is very much a foreign concept to Kuroko, despite being as well read as he is. He simply, truly had no interest in this realm and his only exposure to it has been unrealistic, grandiose descriptions weaved in words. There is a world of difference between reading it and feeling it. "You may be right. I've always just assumed I was asexual, but that clearly isn't true."

He sounds a bit annoyed, but it melts away quickly as he fondly watches Aomine and Kagami get declawed in real time by Akashi's authority. "But I suppose I was comparing myself to others. You and Aomine-kun seem to have a laxer view on these things."

Kise has become a little more well-read since he and Akashi came out in that big splashy way—mostly stuff about LGBT+ people to try to get a better understanding of the community he, the other Miracles, and Kagami basically belonged to outside of the world of fashion.

"Well," Kise began. "It's not like I'm going to be as big a slut as Aominecchi. Like, I'm not planning on getting laid every week once I move to the US. And honestly, I don't think he'll be as active as he says he'll be. But I think most of us," he gestured at the group, "wouldn't mind a one-night-stand here and there, even Midorimacchi."

He shrugged. "Things in the gay community just tend to be more sexual, for better or worse."

"I think Midorima-kun wouldn't be very happy about that about assessment."

He leans back. "I don't think it's a bad thing. I suppose I'm wired differently. Or maybe I'm old-fashioned, I would prefer to wait for someone I love..."

Kise snorted. "He would. I've actually put some thought into this, along with Aominecchi, and I've ranked us all from least likely to most likely to have a one-night stand. It's goes; you, Midorimacchi, Akashicchi, Murasakibaracchi, me, then Aominecchi."

He gave Kuroko a wicked grin, which then softened to a fond smile as his gaze drifted back over to Akashi. "Well, that's true of all of us for our first times, at least. It's why Aominecchi hasn't gone prowling like an alleycat yet."

"What a strange thing to spend time thinking about," Kuroko chuckles a bit at the ranking, but it doesn't seem entirely off-base.

"Even Aomine-kun has a romantic side to him, hm?" He follows his gaze to Akashi and realizes something. "Oh - I meant it when I say I'd prefer nobody else to know. Don't discuss this with Akashi-kun."

Kuroko was always good at suppressing his true feelings and thoughts, but it never seems to work around the redhead. The last thing he wants is for his crush to be realized and complicate things. Akashi seemed so much happier dating Kise, after all.

"Maybe," Kise said. "But it's kinda normal in my world, with modeling and my dad being a former go-go dancer slash soft-core porn writer. Granted, he did always censor his stories with us."

He gave Kuroko a long look before realizing where his friend's gaze was.

Ah. Okay, that made much more sense than Kuroko realizing he had feelings for him. A jolt of jealousy stabs through him, but he's not sure who he's jealous of; Akashi for having the attention of the guy he liked or Kuroko for wanting Akashi.

Both, he realized. He takes a breath, lets the feeling go, then leans over and hugs Kuroko. "I won't say anything," he promised.

He's talked to Akashi about who he likes, and there's no one at the moment. Akashi isn't aromantic, but he may be similar to Kuroko in that aspect. Though Akashi's sex drive is, well, Kise has no complaints about any part of their relationship, least of all its physical and intimate elements. They are very fond of each other, and the connection is emotionally personal as much as it is physically, but it's not true love. It's very close, and if he and Akashi stayed like this forever, Kise would be thrilled. But they can't, and that fact doesn't sadden Kise as much as it would if it was true love.

Maybe he's wired differently, too.

Kuroko makes a small, confused noise at the sudden hug. Weirdly, it feels more like he's the one comforting the blond, but he takes it in stride, wrapping his arms around Kise and patting him on the back.

"Thank you. I'm sure with a little bit of time, it won't even be relevant anymore." He can totally ignore his feelings and let them fade! Kise managed to do it, after all! (He winces a bit internally at this thought.)

"Time puts a balm on all wounds," he said. "Sometimes even heals them."

The big cats are up again and were forced to team up together against Midorima and Murasakibara.

"C'mon," he said, standing and offering a hand to Kuroko. "Let's go help the idiots taste pavement. They deserve to be humiliated every once in awhile, don't they?"

He reaches up to take it with a laugh. "Yes, they do, let's teach them a lesson."

Their numbers are a bit uneven, but that doesn't really matter when it's easily devolves back into a contest of who can pull off the best trick shots. Kuroko swaps between the teams as he sees fit and is just happy to send his passes to anyone who is willing to catch them. The satisfaction burns as bright as it ever does when his Phantom Shot sinks neatly into the hoop. He is glowing, even as Aomine hooks him into a noogie.

As Kuroko's getting noogied by Aomine, Kise and Akashi are having a quiet talk on the other side of the court, making plans for the rest of the evening.

It's starting to get late, and Murasakibara starts to make noises about having to catch a train to his older brother's place. Midorima mentions he promised to have dinner with Takao's family that evening.

"Akashicchi and I have a hotel for the night," he told Kuroko, Aomine, and Kagami. Aomine was about to make a lewd comment but was cut off by a look from Akashi. "What are your guys' plans?"

Kuroko helps punctuate Akashi's stern look with a swift jab of his elbow into Aomine's side, leaving the taller boy to catch his breath for a moment as he move over to his bag to grab a towel.

"We'll probably go to Maji Burger." He turns over and gestures at the blond. "Kise-kun, come over here for a moment."

"What's up?" Kise asked as he walked a few steps away with the shorter boy. He gives Aomine a dirty look as he passed by him, but the blue Miracle waggles his eyebrows at him.

Ugh. Aomine is too nosy and horny.

He reaches into the side pocket of his bag for something and holds it out towards Kise. On his hand rests a small item - a cheap Daiso plastic gift bag decorated in imagery of shells and fish, inside a single pearl stud earring on a plain display card.

"Souvenir from Ehime. And a birthday present. My mother signed us up for a pearl farming tour and they had us make something." He scratches at his chin with his other hand. "I thought it would suit you best."

"Oh." Kise looked down at it, his eyes going a little misty. "It's beautiful."

He reached up, unclipped the golden ring from his ear, and switched it out with the pearl stud. "Thank you, Kurokocchi!"

His smile was bright as the sun. "What do you think?" he asked.

"It looks good," he smiles back, a little more reserved, but happy nonetheless to see his gift so well-received. It feels nice to be the reason for that beaming smile. "It is your birthstone, after all."

He wipes away at sweat with the towel now hanging around his neck. "Supposedly, the luster can shine with an entire rainbow of hues." Very fitting for them. "I don't really have an eye for that sort of thing, but maybe in the right light?"

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject